I'm so lost. Lost doesn't even begin to describe it. Not just with my weight, but also with my entire life. I'm confused and I feel like a complete mess. My emotions are all over the place and I think it's all because of my eating.When I have a 'fat day' where I feel so disgusted in myself, I go insane and my whole family gets stuck with my appalling mood. The other day, I was so angry over the slightest thing that happened, and I snapped; It was so bad, I was in the kitchen and I was hysterical, so much so that I was very very close to getting a knife out of the draw... and, well, you get the horrible picture.
University, my final year, starts on monday.
I'm nervous and have a million things running through my mind. They have free services available, one of them is counselling so I think I'm going to give it a try.
If I don't get myself under control, well, my parents said this is my last chance.
Yes, it's almost been an entire month, but I've decided to get devoted again. I've got to give it all I have.
Since christmas I've been struggling. Current weight is around 63kg's.
Here is my new goal guideline;
(Week; Calories requires- in yellow, Weight target for the week)
| 01 | 862 | 62.22 |
| 02 | 853 | 61.44 |
| 03 | 844 | 60.67 |
| 04 | 836 | 59.89 |
| 05 | 827 | 59.11 |
| 06 | 818 | 58.33 |
| 07 | 809 | 57.56 |
| 08 | 801 | 56.78 |
| 09 | 792 | 56 |
| 10 | 783 | 55.22 |
| 11 | 775 | 54.44 |
| 12 | 766 | 53.67 |
A positive note; I've been doing this for a year, and I've kept 10kg's (22lbs) off!
I think you should definitely give counseling a try! What's the harm You know? my mood is the exact same way. Once started crying and getting hysterical because I couldn't get cheese fries to purge for later. It makes you feel bad because you don't realize how irrational and angry you sound till later. Last year of univeristy! That's exciting! I'm kinda on the same boat with only having a few months tool high-schools over. Its exciting and nerve wracking all at the same time.
ReplyDeleteYay for keeping 22 pounds off! Hope day is fantastic! :)
Oh honey you'll be fine :) Counselling does sound like a good idea though. And at least you're 22 lbs lighter than last year - you can do it and you will do it :) xx
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry that you're feeling a mess at the moment, but we all have those times and you will get through it :) its also great that you *didnt* get the knife out the draw, so it's not as bad as it could be - focus on that :)
ReplyDeleteI'm sure your final year will go well and you should try to make the most of it :)
Your plan looks great - good luck!
Lottie x