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Friday, June 8, 2012

Not dead, just incredibly lost

Hi. It's been so long. I'm not dead, hence the fact I have written this post.
I've been keeping my distance because it means if I'm here then I have to face the facts.
Facing a reality which hurts too much right now. I'm so incredibly fat it is outrageous. I miss feeling good.

My parents tell me to go to the gym- but I don't.
My sister- oh yes, little miss perfect who goes away for a year and gets fat only to come home and go back to being a skinny bitch again, well, even she tells me I need to loose weight.
I know she's disgusted when she looks at me. She's told me so.

My mind is so lost. I feel like I succeeded last year in every way possible, but this year hasn't been going so well.

If I left you in suspense from my last post, well I'm sorry!
What I wanted to say was;
- taking laxitives long term causes chronic diarrhoea, leading to lack of nutrients
- purging damages the lining of your insides. If you start coughing/ vomiting/purging blood, PLEASE get help ASAP, it means there is a hole in the wall, which causes extreme severe blood loss, and eventual death.

I won't be around for a few more weeks, my exams are here!
I've decided to come clean, a new start, I see no reason to hide my identity;

Hi. My name, my real name, is Megan. I live in Perth, Western Australia.
I have brown hair and brown eyes.
On the 1st of November 2012, this year, I will be 21 years old- and that scares the shit out of me.
I'm in my final year of University to become a Registered Nurse.
I will be thin.
I will do ANYTHING it takes.
And I will look like this;

p.s. This new blogger layout is so confusing!

I am being, and have been, completely honest. If you want to ask me anything at all, I will answer to the best of my ability.


  1. I'm not all impressed with the new layout. It's been a royal pain so far.

    Don't let your family make you feel bad about your weight. You only have to be accountable to one person, yourself. You'll set your own goals and reach them in a manner of your choosing. Everyone else can f*ck off.

    Good luck on your finals!

    Stay strong and remember that you are beautiful :)

  2. Hi, I'm Emma--I don't think I've introduced myself. :)

    It's mean of your family to pester you about your weight. As if you, and all of us here, don't worry about it enough! You're strong, and you will show them.

    Best of luck on your exams!