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Wednesday, February 23, 2011

1 step forward, 2 steps back

Monday I was, 68.5kg's and today I'm 68.9! NO! It's supposed to be going down not up!
To be quite honest I'm starting to wonder if this will last. Can I actually make it to my goal weight?
And if I do, will I keep it off or just go gain even more weight?
We'll I'm not giving up yet. It hasn't even been 2 weeks and I'm already feeling like a failure.
But I guess I'm only a true failure if I do give up.

I've been looking at thinspo and blogs for a good hour and a bit so I won't have a home made snickerdoodle (I know!! What a weird name. Google it if you don't know what it is. I think it's american).
It's working because it's almost dinner time and I know I'll be ok after that.
I watch what I eat like crazy at the moment, it's just so I can get used to how many calories everything contains, then it will just get to a point and I'll know without having to look or measure.
I'm getting better, I know a few things; 3/4 cup of fresh raw green grapes = 118, 1 snickerdoodle = 100, 1 skinless roasted chicken drum= 180.
While I'm adding the calories up, I look at some things and think that they are some crazy huge amount, when in reality it's not half bad.

ANYWAY! I have a goal for this weekend! I bought a dress- size L and it almost fits- I'm having trouble doing it up around the area just before my boobs, so I'm hoping by saturday night I'll fit into it perfectly. It's for a friends birthday party, but the dress is kind of skimpy and shows my huge legs and arms so I'll be finding ways to cover them up.
I think my stomach is getting slightly smaller (might be due to the sit up's I now do every day), but my thighs and arms are still a huge problem. I'm buying weights for my arms the next time I get paid but thighs are my biggest problem area and I just don't know how to rid of them!

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